Recently this woman became the first female to ever sing our country's historic national anthem! This stellar performance marks a turning point for women around the world.
If you were watching the debate last night you were probably as shocked as everyone else at home was when they saw a woman take to the mic. It is a long standing tradition for a man to sing our country's spectacular national anthem before every single political matter, but this liberal did not seem to care for our traditions at all. Out of nowhere, this woman blasphemously asserts herself on the man's stage and tells the man to quote "Beat it!".
"Beat it!" -- a woman
Her punk hairstyle and revealing clothing shown above shocked everyone in the room that had even a shred of decency. However, being noticeably pale she was not asked to leave immediately unlike the man seen walking around the perimeter of the building in a suspicious black hoodie. After she spit on the ground in front of the robbed singer she began to boss the local band around until they all tuned to the key that she wanted. C Major just was not cutting it today.
The National Anthem was written by Thom Yorke in 1788 with its last revision in 2000.
Once the woman began singing the glorious lyrics the room finally calmed down from the uproar. Hearing the praise of our great and wondrous nation soothes the hearts and minds of happy citizens everywhere and it happened once again. Once the performance was over everyone gave her a salute and scatterings of applause throughout the amphitheater. On this day, we learned the true ability the women are capable of possessing thanks to this blue beauty. Not only can they look good and do things for us, but women can entertain us as well! Who knew?
As a kind reward for her performance she was escorted out of the building without handcuffs and given a smaller fine than usual. The liberal snowflakes pushed it a little during this event but everything turned out happy in the end thanks to the actions of our brave boys in blue. In future events we will follow the established protocol and have performers receive permission from their male partners before being allowed onstage. We hope this event did not shock viewers too much.
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